I have noticed that oftentimes when seeing an Asian woman and a white man, she rarely looks happy. This can be observed with the general appearance of the woman of her interactions with her husband or lover. Also on inspecting some old photographs taken over the course of my life, it was interesting to read the deterioration of the body language between my mother and father.
What started as photographs in which my father leaned in towards my mother, she seemed ambivalent at best to him, as if he were an accessory. After this point, later and later she seemed to not appear in any photos with him, and if he was there, he would be distant, both physically never appearing next to my mother and just drifting off vacantly, such as staring at the ceiling. This was noticeable enough for me seeing these photographs given to me on New Years Day, that I couldn’t say it was coincidental.
This happens with frequency. There are numerous semi celebrities (attention whores) on Weibo who are married to foreigners but rarely appear in photographs with them. The child is often the centerpiece but sometimes just an accessory to the mother’s attention seeking.
Now, I am specifically referring to westernized Asian women with white men; not only are they for the most part more unattractive, but look perpetually angry. Why would this be? I venture that this has several reasons.
1) The woman has an ideal for a white male, and feels deserving of a Prince Charming, who by most definitions is white. However because of either her inability to win a high value white male, or because she equates whiteness with status, she eventually realized that the vision of her lover differs very much from the reality of being with a white male of average of below average status. Hence the high divorce rate or the complete indifference she has towards him. Going back to the photos of my mother and father, in contrast my uncle and aunts who have been married for thirty years actually held hands walking back from our New Years dinner. This kind of genuine affection was missing from and is totally absent from my parents and other asian women and white male couples.
2) The woman had an ideal for an Asian male and was rejected because of her unattractiveness. This is another option but probably frequent in only a certain number of cases.
3) The woman views White males as exotic and an alternative to asian men but realizes that these superficial differences account for little, and finds out that she is now stuck with the run offs from white society and that she has little recourse in turning back to asian men at that point. (Probably most common)
4) The woman was simply a fetishist and her high partner count has made her unattractive to anything but the most naive white men, and given that she is drawn by a perceived domineering masculinity of whiteness, resents the “nice guy” qualities of the white male that has the stomach to marry her. She is torn between her lust for white men and the world’s perception of her as being a stereotypical white-worshipping asian woman; this internalized conflict ultimately destroys her. (E.g., my cousin)
5) The woman is a proclaimed feminist rebelling against what she perceives as an Asian male patriarchy, but finds out, once the high wears off, that white men use her as an easy, promiscuous default alternative to even more feminist white women, this making her a direct accessory to white male patriarchy. (E.g., Jenny An)
6) In a small number of cases, the woman legitimately hates herself; going so far as to color her hair blonde and wear colored contacts (my mother). Undoubtedly it dawns on her that she can never actually be white – hence she becomes (or always has been) extremely unhappy. (My mother, to an extent along with combined factors above)
7) However in some cases the Asian woman looks happy; this seems to be the case in places like Thailand, from where I am writing this. This, of course, results from the literal industry of exchanging money for affection, but more often than not, according to what I’ve heard, these marriages are incredibly unhealthy because the women can barely speak English and involves a literal transaction of money in exchange for sex. However despite this, the reasoning of wanting to ensure a better life is still healthier than wanting to birth a child based on bizarre notions of white supremacy and other sick psycho-social reasons that revolve around the race of the male partner.