“Covert Incest” between Asian Mothers and their Eurasian / Hapa sons?

11917844_906632896084963_1120608620_n.jpg
Xiaxue and her husband Mike. He’s on the far left. Like my parents, my mother didn’t want to be anywhere near my dad after we were born, since the ultimate goal was to just have half Asian babies, not to love the man. Newsflash: If you get into a relationship based on race, you’re probably not the best human beings. “Best of both worlds.” No. Worst of both worlds.
  • I was crazy growing up. Once again, revisit the early pages of this blog to see my craziness on full blast. If you don’t believe I’m hapa, then really, best of luck to what you have in store.

Looking back I’ve begun to actually realize just how crazy white male / Asian woman relationships are. I’m here to tell you exactly what goes on from the inside. I’m snitching on one of the most racist pairings on earth.

If you think about them, they border on the absurd. They are producing by the millions damaged, messed up and potentially violent children. No other pairing comes close to the amount of loaded sexual / political crap that White men / Asian women harbor.

Yes, there are crazy white / black / full Asian people. But for a group of Hapas who are pushed as being the superior ethnic group (e.g., how many times have you heard “best of both worlds”) – we seem to demonstrate a tremendous amount of crazy behavior relative to our small amounts. And more importantly, rather than demonstrating “best of both worlds” behavior, we have fallen very short of our expectations.

On Reddit, a white girl (who is familiar with the experiences of Hapas as one of her friends is a drug addicted half-Korean / half white male) posted this about her therapist in New Zealand.

Just thought I’d report an interesting conversation I had the other day with a friend who is a therapist/counsellor. She told me she started seeing more and more cases with victims of “covert incest” from biracial families. She didn’t specify the races but being in New Zealand I can safely assume she’s speaking of the Hapa population since they’re the biggest mixed-race demographic here.

I didnt even know what covert incest was until I spoke to my friend about it. I have done some searching online about it being more apparent in mixed race families but hardly anything came up. Then again covert incest is a recently discovered topic and not widely spoken about. Considering the racial fetish some people who enter these mixed relationships have – time will tell I guess?

Wikipedia describes “covert incest” as:  “a style of parenting in which a parent looks to their child for the emotional support that would be normally provided by another adult.”

My take on this:

  1. It’s New Zealand. The vast majority of mixed race people there are either half Maori, or half FOB Asian (through their mother, obviously).
  2. I underwent covert incest as well. I just learned this term today.
  3. My mother never loved my father. Not from the beginning. As I said, Asian women use white men, but don’t love them.

My comments on this:

My mother did exactly that; covert incest to me. Not with me. No idea what she did to my brother but probably a thousand times worse as he is a thousand times more messed up than me, 32 and a virgin, and looks very Asian.

I didn’t know “covert incest” existed until about five hours ago and I can say with certainty this is exactly what happened.

In retrospect I imagine it was merely because my mother hated my father, used him for whatever reason, status, integration, citizenship, whiter babies, to show off to her sisters, so that she could feel like a real American, so she could feel “good” about herself since her husband was 6’3″ and red haired, but she used to just sit on my bed and talk shit to me about how worthless my dad was.

This went on for years. Making comments on his eating habits, how he was pathetic, how he would cover his face while he ate, eat sugar straight from the bag, and things like that. Telling me that she refused to have me spend any time with him. Later on she would ask me to come to her bedside and hug her for hours, continuing to talk the same shit. Emotional intimacy was transferred entirely from my father to my brother and to a lesser extent to me. I don’t know what happened with my brother. Again, my parents were sexless.

My possible reasoning for this is parental narcissism. The male child represents possibly the lover she wished she had, or the characteristics she wished she had, such as bigger eyes or whiter physical qualities.

Eurasian men actually are highly desired by Asian women, but failing that they used white men because they are unable to land their ideal male types. Especially among FOB types, who see white men as the key to “beautiful babies” and citizenship in a white country… hence Asian women marry the biggest losers of society with no questions asked.

As I said I don’t actually believe Asian women love white men, but merely use them. Ten years after marriage if the man is not rich or demonstrating Prince Charming qualities, the mother’s mind begins to revert back to the “what if’s” about marrying an Asian man – or better yet, a Eurasian man.

I have a ton of WMAW in my family and their behavior does not represent normative loving couple behavior, more of an extreme nagging-type dominance of woman over man. Many of the women openly insult, berate, or belittle their white boyfriends and husbands, almost in a motherly fashion; hence you see the affection transferred from the man to the child – the man was a tool. Many of these men (come to think of it, actually I think it might be all of them) are Jewish, who come from homes that are largely matriarchal. Partnerships should be equal – not skewed to either side.

I’m willing to bet that actual physical incest is skewed towards white men abusing their children, with covert incest involving Asian mothers and their male children.

We shall see. I’ve asked her to discuss this with her therapist and send this website address to her as well.

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13 thoughts on ““Covert Incest” between Asian Mothers and their Eurasian / Hapa sons?

  1. Men who have domineering mothers often seek out women whom they think are less domineering. Many of these men believe the false stereotype that Asian women are docile and submissive. However, if they are like any of the women in my family, that docility is just part of the game in the early stages of relationship. Once married, they are mostly tiger women, domineering, and controlling. So ironically, the men who seek a docile woman often get the opposite.

    Covert incest will almost always happen in any family where the parent(s) are not getting their needs met. I had to parent both my parents growing up because they were always coming to me to help them solve their emotional and psychological problems.

    I am just so sick of this crap. It doesn’t matter which major city I go in the world, I always see WMAF relationships around me. I couldn’t run away from my past even if I tried. Even if I moved into a cave in the middle of nowhere, as soon as I would go to the nearest city, I am sure I would find WMAF staring at me in my face. I can’t help seeing my parents in every single damn WMAF couple that I see, and all the dysfunctionality that goes along with it. I would say 99% of these couples are like my parents, telling their children that they have the best of both worlds, and that mixed children, hapas specifically are the best of both cultures and genetically superior. Then when you hit high school and college, and the workplace, and are socially shunned by both asians, whites, and every other ethnic group who does not consider you one of them, it’s a whole ‘nother story. Then even better, when Eurasians have emotional problems like depression or worse, the parents blame it on the children, and very seldom take responsibility for their role. Best of both worlds is a fantasy, a theory on paper. It doesn’t reflect society and the real world. The WMAF ideology reminds me of deluded communists who keep marching on to their own drum without listening to anyone, in spite of thousands of blogs online from Eurasians who will be their future children.

    If I could say that most of these couples happened in spite of racism, not because of it, I wouldn’t have the hang ups that I have. But I can’t. I grew up around it. I know it from the inside. The insights on this blog are true, and it’s why I rarely post anywhere else.

    I don’t know what the solution is. I don’t have a solution. That’s what kills me the most. Maybe in a sick and twisted way, it’s supposed to happen. I guess if every Asian woman were to marry a white male, the white race would simply cease to exist because Asians far outnumber whites. All of Europe, North America, and Australia would be Asianized because European / white women would then marry men of other races. And if that were to happen, then WMAF would also cease to exist, because there would simply no longer be anyone of pure European stock left. In the end, WMAF would be the cause of their own undoing. In the reverse fantasy, if every Asian male were to marry a European/white woman, it would speed the process up a lot faster, since white men are already marrying out at high rates. But the truth of the matter is, I don’t like either fantasy. Cultures change with inter-marriage. It’s not the same. It’s hybrid, like me. I don’t want Asian or European cultures to change due to heavy intermarriage. I like them the way they are, and that’s coming from a mixed person. A small percentage of mixed marriage, I don’t mind, that’s diversity. Too much inter-marriage, and it’s anti-diversity. With WMAF, I think it’s way too toxic, happens for the wrong reasons, the rates are way too high, and it’s anti-diversity.

  2. Fellow Hapas and others with interest in these issues, what would you advise in relation to having having children? I am a Hapa female and I love kids. But I know I bear the burden of breaking this abusive cycle and I already fear and worry for my unborn children. It breaks my heart knowing what they will potentially go through. Do any Hapas or Asians have any advice based on their own experience? My kids could end up looking white, Asian, Mexican, whatever and I would love them, but I KNOW Asian women will generally (with exceptions) only like them only if they don’t look Asian. If I have several children I know at least some will look Asian. I don’t have a problem with this but I KNOW Asian women do. I’ve had so much abuse from them already as a Hapa all my life. How can I best prepare for this? I would specifically welcome advice on being the best parent I can be to myEurasian sons.

  3. Using ‘Eurasian’ to describe my future kids as from my side they will have Asian and white blood in them at the very least, Plus whatever gets added in the mix.

      • yes. In some respects it would probably be better for my kids as would be more likely to look Asian, and if I had a family with a proud Asian we could pass the culture and language etc to the kids and construct a solid sense of belonging somewhere for them. Even if they suffered racism (which they would if we lived in the west), we would bring them up as confident Asians, proud to be Asian, fully integrated with their Asian side. Maybe I wouldn’t even tell them about their 1/4 whiteness….but that is a whole other debate. No broken identity or torn loyalties.

        For me, one of many deal breakers is a man who disses or fetishising East Asians, regardless of what his actual race is. If he is Asian it is of course, even worse, because it reflects self-hatred and makes him no different to those horrible white worshipping Asian whores which this blog focuses on. His actual race is less important to me than how he treats East Asians – he shouldn’t be treating them any differently to whites, whether by dissing East Asians or by putting them on some pedestal.

        I would be more inclined to choose an Asian who knows his culture and language and is not a white worshipping idiot, rather than a westernised guy with Asian parents who has no connection with his culture. That’s only because of my experience with western-born Asians, which has mainly been negative as the vast majority tend towards white-worshipping, and even worse, looking down on themselves (despite the memorable exceptions). Having said that, even Asians born in Asia look down upon themselves (Singaporeans and Hong Kongers call mainland Chinese ch1nks even though that’s where all their ancestors are from’…) so maybe Im asking for something that will be very difficult for me to achieve.

        Having said that, I’m not going to start a family with an Asian guy just to “make a point”. I discount any of the Asian/hapa fetish guys (who are usually but not always white – Asian guys have also ‘fetishised’ me) and never give them the time of day.
        I look at patterns reflected in last and present behaviour. No need to discuss The stereotypical white guy who has had loads of different Asian girlfriends from different Asian nationalities, whose opening line is ‘all my past girlfriends have been asian’, who has taught English in Japan and has never once dated any girl of any other race. We all know about those losers.

        The less talked about nuances can be interesting however: the white guy who for example, had 2 serious white girlfriends and 1 serious Asian one, and has friends from various races, is probably ok. The American born Chinese guy who had 3 serious girlfriends who were all blue eyed blondes and has no Asian friends probably has some issues.

          • They wouldn’t actively oppose it. Not out of love but because they don’t care.they have never actively expressed any interest in my personal life, which is probably a blessing in disguise. Some of my Asian extended family are typically white worshipping and treat my loser,abusive dad who doesn’t give a crap about them like a god just because he has white skin and blue eyes. Lots of Asian relatives who have never even met him or spoken to him follow him on social media – lets follow the White guy!

        • Go to China or Korea, there are about 1 in 5 guys there fitting your criteria in terms of racial self-respect. The ratio is about 1/20 in HK, Singapore or Taiwan.

  4. The most disgusting form of incest I observe in WMAF family are those between the white dad and his full Asian step daughter. The dads have no shame, and sometimes neither do the daughters involved.

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