The Truth about being a “Beautiful Half-Asian Hapa Baby”

Some random observations:

  • When you have a son, your privilege as a blue-eyed white male is thrown out the door.

Whereas, if your partner were constantly complimenting your blue eyes, your son will not be able to leverage his blue eyes in order to secure a mate. He will instead have to rely on different factors, and since the number of women, including Asian women, who openly favor Asian men, is much lower, this will be damaging to his emotional well-being. For every Asian woman who deliberately rejected Asian men, so forth will your Eurasian son be rejected. My clash with my monumental ego and narcissism, years back, where I was literally obsessed with my looks, sent me into a rage when I was rejected by a white woman for being Asian (I’ve mentioned this many times before).

  • On “beautiful Hapa babies.”

This is by and large a lie. All babies are universally cute, but this does not translate to being an attractive male. A desire for a beautiful baby is essentially on par with having a pet; hence you see many divorced Asian women (divorced largely because of their insane behavior, like my mother’s, wherein the child is part of a fantasy) using their children as status symbols. My mother constantly showed me off to her siblings and mentioned my tall nose and deep eyes whereas ostracizing my father, but again, this does not translate to necessary success in the future; it is borderline narcissism wherein the love for the child is not love per se, but love as long as [qualifications] exist.

If you do a youtube search for “half asian babies” you will find a number bragging about how their children have blue eyes; despite this being impossible, the idea that such white worship is prevalent is extremely, extremely troublesome.

My case was unusual. My mother seemed to like my brother more than me despite him being black haired, black eyed. She Tiger Mommed him more than me, but less cruelly; I began to think that it was because I was either born via C-section or because I didn’t look like her, or even some kind of resentment towards me. My memory doesn’t go back that far so I can’t figure out the reason for this yet.

On “beauty;” In fact, any person who will want to make the distinction (i.e., a person who doesn’t like Asians) will not differentiate between full Asian and half, even if you don’t look Asian. Go on any website discussing white looking Eurasians like Adam Smith or Cary Fukunaga, and the comments are there.

  • I’ve come across many Hapas who complained of feeling embarrassed while walking with their parents. I have experienced this too, but moreso, more when walking with my father (as my mother is dead).

Regardless of their intentions, (and I know my parents’ were bad), the assumptions made that my father was an Asiaphile, a loser, or couldn’t get a white woman are there. In my case, they were true, but I don’t think most people bother to differentiate when it’s so common. Obviously, there will be exceptions to this rule, particularly among less intelligent Hapas, like my brother. 

  • It’s frankly impossible for a Eurasian to not notice the interracial imbalance unless they come from entirely white states.

I think many Eurasians that you meet on the street, especially the tall, good looking ones, tend to favor White women (if they can) out of a subconscious rejection of the “white-fever” and “yellow-fever” they are associated with by extension, in any major American city. Another thing could be their rejection of their Asian side, as it is obvious to them that looking Asian is frankly a death sentence. Part of me thinks that Eurasian women do this too, mostly out of a repugnance for their own mothers… if you go read some of the comments on this blog, there are a ton of Eurasian girls complaining about emotional abuse from their mothers.

 

Hapas / Half Asians Are the only Race Born With the Implicit Understanding that Race Matters

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I’m leaving this picture (with enough detail to show that I don’t have full-Asian features) as proof of the direness of the situation. Ivy League educated, 6’0″ tall, from a prominent family, had many girlfriends, popular and well liked and described as “brilliant” at several points, etc., etc. The point of this website is now to expose Asian women, the white men who patronize them, their lies to their own children, their reasons for marrying, and the mental cost on the children. There is no way a Eurasian could possibly respect an Asian woman as mother if she had even the slightest inkling of racism against Asian men come out of her mouth at any point in her life, and even more so if she was like many others and demanded a white male.

 

What I mean is this:

There are going to be a tremendous, massive amount of Hapas / Eurasians born in the coming years; almost all of them with white fathers. The amount of baggage from this is going to be too much for these young people to handle. I don’t give two shits about the behavior of Asian men or other cultural reasons for this. The outcome remains uniform.

Asian women are deliberately saying that Asian men are not worthy, inferior, or generally sub-par in comparison to Asian, and even non-Asian men. There is no way that a generation of half-Asians is going to be able to generate a healthy identity as a result of this. A handful of “successful” Eurasians that you met in passing doesn’t indicate anything.

The majority of these Hapas will have had mothers that explicitly said “no Asians.” The rest will have Asian mothers who didn’t necessarily hate Asian men, but still decided that a white man was more suitable than an Asian man. Even more will have mentally-unstable mothers who decided irrationally that white men provided a fantasy for her, one that he was stupid or selfish enough to entertain. (Mine was a combination of all three, hence the broken marriage). I suspect this is mere biology at play, wherein the average white guy is a better choice than the average Asian male; I suspect this has something to do with primitivism and body hair, or something else. Probably has to do with integration and more-so to do with utter fantastical dreaming. If you’re not sure, just look at how Asian women talk behind closed doors about “blue eyes” and European features. I’ve heard it time and time again.

As most Eurasians will notice that all other Eurasians have white fathers, and will come in contact with Asian women who say “no Asians,” this is setting an incredibly dangerous precedent. The difference between “bad couples” and “good couples” is going to be incredibly difficult to differentiate between as Asian women are seen time, after time, after time and time again with white men.

My father was, and is a “respectful” Asiaphile and at one point a PhD candidate in East Asian Studies, who could speak two Asian languages and yet the agony of being biracial remains; the agony of having a mother who valued race above anything remains; the agony of having a bad person as a mother remains, the agony of being rejected from both sides remains; the agony of having to live with the embarrassment of saying that my mother is Asian and my father white, remains.

What’s happening is this:

  • Asian women are choosing handsome white men over ugly Asian men
  • Asian women are choosing ugly white men over handsome Asian men
  • Asian women are choosing handsome white men over handsome Asian men
  • Asian women are choosing bad white men over good Asian men
  • Asian women are choosing bad white men over bad Asian men
  • Asian women are choosing good white men over bad Asian men

As we have seen with Daniel Holtzclaw and Elliot Rodger, the potential blowback from this is tremendous, as young Eurasian men are reminded constantly of their low value before they even set out the door. There is absolutely nothing that could convince a Eurasian with eyes in his head of his inherent value when this is so common.

I challenge anyone who reads this to provide me a reason why this is not fundamentally correct on a terrifying level.

Imagine the utter hell of being a Eurasian son but being literally surrounded by Asian women who literally worship white men, and even worse, seeing this within your own home. We live this every day. The ones who don’t look white enough to disregard any discussion of race.

Essentially, these couples are expecting Eurasians to take this baggage, and figure it out on their own, independently, without a single word of advice from two people completely opposed to their interests as Eurasian men.

I’m guessing you guys didn’t think that one through, did you.

Yeah, good luck. Seriously. You’re all going to need it. There are literally millions of us and all it would take would be another Renz, Holtzclaw, De Grood or Rodger before it becomes your problem. Or, you could read this website and reexamine your entire lives to prevent what is now inevitable.

Or you could pretend I’m not Eurasian, everything I said is a lie, and go back to whatever meaningless crap you do.

 

“Real Life with A Japanese Wife”

My cliff notes:

  • Asian women that refuse their own men are probably not the best people, by the same rule of thumb that men of other races operate on (e.g., most black men would despise a black woman who hated black men; most white men would despise a white woman who hated white men). Even the Asian women who post here married to white men reveal “telling” character issues.
  • This is all well and dandy except the marriage results in children who grow up with parents who never actually liked each other and were together for the sake of convenience or fetishism. On top of that we’re constantly reminded that Asian men, which we are, failed to be seen, even by Asian women, as worthy of existing.

Somebody posted this video on Reddit. Looking through the comments it seems a lot of white men came to an agreement. I didn’t watch all of it, maybe the first three minutes but that’s enough to make my commentary.

White men falsely perceive Asian women as being more morally sound. This is incorrect because any morally sound woman wouldn’t idealize the men of another race. This isn’t racist. This is saying that in a moral ideal, races wouldn’t have different values; most men are way too egotistical and / or naive to question the behavior of why a woman likes them.

(The issue becomes much more complex when Asian-looking sons are involved, however; hence I am forced to think about these things while my father is not.)

White men go through their entire lives not overtly being hit on by women, and then an Asian woman does it and they don’t see red flags; despite a decade of being verbally humiliated by my mother (taking his gifts and throwing them against the wall, for example), he still believes her to be an angel because of her “traditional values”.

I’ve been hit on by women of all races. It’s actually fairly common (or was when I was younger, probably not so much now, there is, in my case, a truth to Eurasian beauty; not so much in the case of others). So I understand that women have something called autonomy – they don’t sit around waiting for a “good guy” with XXXXXX bank account to marry.

I’m not talking about approaching women – most men can get dates like that after a certain point in their life after they accumulate enough capital; I’m talking about having certain qualities that make women approach you when you’re young (i.e., looks, good hair, height, narrow-tapered waist and broad shoulders, confidence, non-neurotic behavior).

A lot of white guys go their whole lives never attracting attention from a white woman in the west; they go to Asia and suddenly are approached by Asian women, or are approached by Asian American women, and they think this is indicative of a moral agency, rather than, in objective terms, bias, or even worse, ulterior motives. (By moral agency, I mean that it is assumed that they like “traditional values,” as embodied by a white man).

Most men completely lack the self-awareness and experience to discern between a foreign woman’s “attention” and genuine love, which, if she had been living in her own space for 20-some odd years, would at very least have leveled against a single local guy, at one point in her life.

Anyways, my dad was and is an extreme paleoconservative. But it doesn’t have anything to do with his politics. There was no way in hell he could ever have landed a white woman; to this date he is unable to make prolonged eye contact with most other people. He mistook my mother’s affection for him as a sign of morality when in fact it was his height and blue eyes that were the draw.

Their entire marriage was a hell of death threats, separate bedrooms, swinging knives, verbal abuse, sexlessness, and yet he still couldn’t see it. He couldn’t imagine that a woman that scorned her own race of men wasn’t exactly sane.

The reason he didn’t know this was because he has never been with an Asian woman who liked her own men or a woman who liked Asian men; I am, and the differences are staggering. She adores children, is traditionally beautiful by Chinese standards, constantly gets complimented on her looks, and told me when we first went out that she “would never had said yes were I not half Chinese,” and that her primary qualification for a partner was “stability” and a “stable life.” I’ve also noticed in my life that the women interested in me had a tendency towards real beauty (not just mini-skirt hotness) and came from “normal” backgrounds; i.e., Jewish women, Caribbean immigrants, Indian, Mexican and Polish immigrants.

This is exactly a contrast to a woman who wants “a foreign husband,” because this entails a fantasy about what life with a foreigner is like, and when the fantasy proves to be different from her mental ideal, she will exhibit the childish, psychotic behavior that made her unable to differentiate between fantasy and reality in the first place.

Of course I expect the collective IQ of the “yellow fetishists” who read this blog to be too low to understand this post, so I leave you with the warning that being a piece of shit and marrying a piece of shit is fine.

The problem is that your son will be half-Asian and the ball is up in the air after that.

“My Parents Were Not Like That! They Were in Love!”

I’m sure they were, and I’m not being sarcastic. I mean it.

It’s convenient though that love appears to be so color-centric.

Was your mother escaping poverty? Was she too unattractive to find a decent Asian male? If so, yes, it may very well be, and is love.

My mother wasn’t. She deliberately sought out a white male. There are millions of these women and they don’t merely just pass along through life and die; they create children.

I had the privilege of seeing exactly what happens when a woman seeking the All American Prince Charming and the White Picket Fence lifestyle got stuck with a balding office worker and an eight hundred square foot apartment nowhere near a subway line.

Love no longer became a delusion of mine. Pray tell me – assuming white dad was no longer able to provide mom with the fantasy of whiteness and American inclusion – would she still love him?

Mine didn’t. In fact, love wasn’t even there when they first met, and there wasn’t enough money to keep the “love” balloon inflated for more than a few years.

The ULTIMATE Collection of Links on the Reality of WM/AW Couples: READ BEFORE COMMENTING

Summary:

Being biracial is an incredibly complex issue, especially considering when the majority of biracial people tend to fall along similar lines of parentage. It is oxymoronic for any bi-racial group to develop a healthy identity when it is saturated with latent implications of racial-gendered superiority and inferiority.

(In layman’s terms, do you really expect millions of Hapas, born overwhelmingly to parents who thought Asian men unattractive – let’s be honest, that’s what’s going on, and surrounded by Asian women who hate Asian men, are going to be normal?)

Hypothesis: The frequency of the relationships between White males and Asian women (as opposed to the infrequency of the relationship between Asian men and White women) is primarily based on the uniform higher status, higher economic standing or biological desirability of white men…

and

…the intentional or unintentional universal undesirability or lower status of Asian males – explaining the monumentally unbalanced interracial dating ratios. Eurasian sons, in particularly, are largely considered Asian men and fail to benefit from the social and sexual freedom (i.e., not being stereotyped as misogynist and / or asexual) their fathers had, unless they are extremely lucky, and live with the baggage of a peculiar kind of pairing that is weighed with heavy sociological implications.

Regardless of any politicized or non-politicized belief, politically correct or not, the fact remains from both empirical evidence provided by Eurasians (not by white men or Asian women), and data aggregated by /r/Hapas, that Eurasians are still constantly reminded that they are of less value than white men, even by women who will someday become future mothers to Asian looking Eurasian sons and even by the men who themselves are the fathers to Asian looking Eurasian sons.

Read More »

Hapa Thought Exercise

Let’s say you did not know your mother and father.

Let’s also say, for this thought exercise, that you were fully Asian. Or as a Hapa, that you looked fully Asian.

In a time of trouble, i.e., a climate of extreme racism, violence against Asians, mass lynchings, extreme anti-Asian propaganda, yellow peril, war with China or North Korea after 2016 elections, etc.

Would your parents (as strangers) have cared about you? Would your mother (as a stranger) have sympathized with you? Would they have reached out to you as an Asian male? Would they have attempted to bolster the community?

This is actually a legitimate question we all as Hapas need to ask ourselves.

I expect most of you to answer: no

To most of the questions. Wake up call, Hapa kiddos.

On The Reality of Being Mixed Race

Being mixed race actually sucks a huge amount, and I believe this relates back to the primitive urges and desires and psyche that exists in every last human being, regardless if we admit this or not. But more importantly, in the real world, being mixed is simply the result of two young people idealizing the other’s culture and appearance, and having kids, who are then excluded from economic, social and romantic opportunities that both parents found easily because of their privilege (White men and Asian women are extremely privileged in society).

I suggest this be read by both whites, Asians, and mixed race people. I will try to keep this objective.

I am quite resentful about certain things and while it is normal for people to be resentful I do imagine that life can be simplified when we maintain the status quo as defined by nature; despite it being good for ones ego to be validated by another race (of men or women) the effects on the child are well documented, yet completely ignored.

Most people really do believe that being a Hapa is some kind of blessing – but the people that say this are people who are not mixed, or people who went through periods of extreme confusion and stress to only come out of it with a renewed mentality.

In my case, I went through a period of having no stress (I was crazy, but didn’t pinpoint it to my race) – to arriving at the conclusion that being mixed absolutely sucks.

The myth of the “beautiful Hapa” was only engineered as a justification for people with trans-racial lust and fetishization. Note that the claim that all Hapas are beautiful and intelligent is extremely racist since it implies that they are better because they have white blood.

This blog has been up for quite a while and I don’t think I’ve ever received a proper response to the questions posed – namely how a male child is supposed to function when born under the conditions of power and imbalance between the races that favor the white male and disfavor the Asian male;

The only response I did receive was one that said that I should use my “white blood” to my advantage; ironically in doing so I could probably achieve more in life, but it would be a betrayal of myself, and the extreme nihilism of doing this won’t really ever make me able to get over my extreme distaste for my mother (long, long before I realized who she really was I had nightmares about her maybe two-three times a week for 10 years, and I was told by an old classmate that I was laughing at her funeral).

Some of the things I feel resentful about, as a WM/AW Hapa.

  • I feel resentful that I am considered “better” because of my white blood; I would rather face the full brunt of racism than have to live with the knowledge of being superior because of my whiteness.
  • I actually was not fully taught to deal with racism, it was only after entering my 20’s when my appearance became more Asian looking that I was faced with racism and unable to cope with it in a rational way.
  • I feel resentful that I am treated differently than how I would be treated were I fully Asian. I would prefer to be aware of people’s true feelings rather than be treated accordingly with my white features.
  • I feel resentful that I was lied to about success, when Asian women like my mother gladly sleep with losers like my father provided they are white.
  • I feel resentful, now having been to China, that I am excluded from a burgeoning economy and a culture of amazing advancement, simply because my mother had a fetish.
  • I feel resentful that people are naturally clannish;
  • In this regard I feel resentful that the culture my mother had the audacity to raise me in (Chinese), excludes me from employment, from social life, and from true inclusion, despite me considering myself culturally Chinese.
  • I feel resentful that my mother valued whiteness, which implies I have to betray half of myself to meet the acceptable standards of my own mother.
  • I feel resentful in being taught to be proud to be Chinese, yet only under the conditions that I had a white father.
  • I feel resentful that the women that I feel I have a natural bond with prefer white males (most men subconsciously prefer women who resemble their mothers); including my own parents.

The “Eurasians are Beautiful” myth 

Eurasians are not attractive.

Actually, it is white men who are attractive. Hence our mothers all uniformly threw themselves at them.

The Eurasian beauty myth was merely the result of attempts to justify the white fetishes of our mothers; most Eurasians at best resemble off-white people or slightly less robust whites. At worst we look exactly like the Asian males that our mothers desperately tried to avoid. The entire premise of Eurasian beauty is that we are better than full Asians. 

So ultimately it’s not us who are beautiful. It’s white men that are. We’re just the fallout from this nuclear level act of sexual selection.

You Know the Best Thing about Being A Hapa (Asian feminists please respond)

Knowing that if I looked Asian like my brother; I’d have gotten bullied worse than people thinking I’m a Russian thug.

Knowing that if I got bullied I could expect my own mother would be blowing and rewarding my own bullies while I’m putting a gun to my head. Thanks parents! What do you say to that, Asian feminists?

The more I learn about Chinese culture, the more I surround myself with everyday people who care about me, who never once abused me for not looking like them, who fed me and gave me a roof over my head, the more I realize what monsters racists and people like my own mother and women in my family are.

The more I realize that I had been free of racism my entire life – yet my very own brother was not – makes me instantly lose virtually any lingering respect not only for her – but every other woman in my family that was once dear to me. This happened literally within days of coming to this realization.

Or maybe I should just be proud to be Asian? Or which is it? Proud to not be fully Asian? Proud that my own brother faces discrimination while I coast by in life?

Proud that people whom I could otherwise look like get painted why a wide brush while people who look like me (non-Asian) get a pass from virtually all generalizations about the controlling nature of Asian men? I’m expected to sit here, knowing my 6’2″ white father is a monumental racist and conservative while I’m expected to believe and accept that’s very single asian man I’ve met, the ones who took care of me when I was deathly ill and alone in Beijing, the ones who earn four hundred dollars a month and live four to a room while I can make several times that just by virtue of showing up with my white last name?

I’m supposed to believe and accept that women in my own family adopted white last names, were married to or are married to white males, all tall, of course, and that I need to accept that this is because of some severe cultural flaw in Asian society, but only Asian men, the same men with whom I share minor superficial features?

I’m supposed to merely accept, while my adoptive family in Beijing are making dumplings right in front of me, all of then with smiles and concern for each other, who took care of me and gave me a roof over my head when there wasn’t a single person who ever gave a damn about me, when I was on the brink of suicide, and ESPECIALLY not my brother, and would definitely have given less a damn about me had I been born with oriental eyes?

As a mixed race person who looks predominantly white – I say right now that there are levels of privilege in society. White males have amazing privilege, as I have experienced and written about before. Guess who has next? It used to be white women – until they went off on their own and made enemies with the white global male powers; so now it’s Asian women, sidled up with the white male “patriarchy” as if it’s a default.

Asian women are privileged. They don’t get called gook and chink on the street. My brother did. My friends and my family did. But I never did. But my children will. From a Hapa: you’re all filthy liars. All of you. Maybe you can convince yourself you’re doing some kind of good. But your children will pay for your sins.

It’s quite simple, as I’ve reiterated over, and over, and over again: a non-white male, in western society, will be demeaned almost constantly for his race – and this includes your very own child. He will then try to either hide or take pride in his heritage – but he will find it next to impossible to take pride in his heritage when his own mother sought to demean it and destroy it by proxy of a white male. And you wonder why Hapas are so troubled?

I have yet to find even a single WORD coming from Asian women about the realities of their Eurasian sons, only until after they have children and come to terms with the realities and fruition of their terrible actions, and out of some perverse kind of guilt try to redact what they did by imposing their own views on Hapas. But nobody can be a Hapa but a Hapa – and to be a Hapa is to form your own opinions of your parents; and by going outside and viewing the reality of race relations in the West it’s virtually impossible to form a positive opinion of an Asian woman and a white male, including our own parents.

Go kiss your mothers, Eurasian dipshits


Particularly the ones who look Asian. Is it any wonder why Eurasians born from White males and Asian women dominate the charts when it comes to mental illness?

How is a Eurasian son supposed to take pride in his heritage when that same very heritage was routinely insulted and ostracized by his mother and Asian women like her in the present day?

(Oh, but not all Asian women – but enough to this is such a common trope with such a frequency that it is surprising to even ME when a British, American, Australian or Canadian-Asian woman has anything positive to say about Asian men – until her son is born). “Oh, but it’s not about the race, it’s about the culture” – which is why the white guy is almost always tall. I’m writing this as a Eurasian who looks predominantly white – and here I am, against the great liberal movement instilled on me against White Supremacy (taught to me for four years at my university), unable to take pride in my Asian heritage because I know for a FACT that it’s a dead-end to a love life (I went nearly a decade denying I was Asian).

I am not Asian, per se, but I am not white – and I take absolutely no pride in claiming either as that would merely imply that my parents, and by extent, white supremacy won. Obviously, most men “love” their mothers – their mothers love them too, since the process of childbirth forms an unconditional bond. But this love is merely the result of biological bonding and to deny the very fact that our own mothers spent decades spitting the most vile vitriol is enough to undo that bond.

It doesn’t make sense that a Eurasian child can be healthy when he is expected to be raised under the banner of Asian female submission to (and deliberate selection) of white masculinity (i.e., tall, fair skinned white men). He’s a man of color born to a woman who spread her legs for a white man. IT DOES NOT MAKE SENSE AND IT WILL NEVER MAKE SENSE. The internet is filled with blogs (Grace Hwang Lynch, Deanna Fei, Dorcas Cheng-Tozun) written by Asian women who express anything from pangs of guilt to slight concerns about: A) How their sons either will be received in the white western community that Asian women spread their legs so easily for acceptance into. B) How their sons feel emotionally distant. So, what, are we supposed to go thanking our white daddy for impregnating our Asian mothers and making us whiter? Is that supposed to make us healthy?