If Asian women are world-famous for having "white fever" and hating Asian men, what happens when they have a son who looks Asian? I happen. This is the blog of a Dartmouth educated Eurasian son of a racist, conservative, underemployed, conspiracy theorist white man and a Hong Kong woman who had "white fever," documenting the immense damage and abuse done over 20 years of living under one of the most hateful, racist pairings on Earth.
At least two (back right, front) of these kids are half-Asian with Asian mothers.
Well done, WMAW, you’ve done an amazing job.
White male / Asian woman privilege leaves the building when you have a kid… welcome to the world of Eurasians males. “Oh, these guys are short and ugly.” I’m tall, good looking and out going and yeah, been told numerous times, “I don’t like Asian guys.”
I am a formerly well liked, handsome, outgoing, popular, Dartmouth educated Eurasian man born to a Chinese mother who sought out marriage into the powered WASP class – but then realized too late that the man she married was an underemployed, emotionally damaged, meek, conspiracy theorist male – and she essentially killed herself. At around age 20 I encountered anti-Asian racism and due to inheriting my father’s entitlement to the world, I was unprepared to deal with it; I am emotionally unstable, self-loathing, addicted, underemployed, have strong intimacy issues, and unable to form proper relationships due to my self-hatred instilled on me during the first 20 years of my life. Unlike other Eurasians who find self-esteem in underpaid modeling jobs, my self-implosion has been broadcast to the world to the point that I am internet famous. I am not afraid to be as viciously honest as I need to be in order to speak on the reality of this world.
If you don’t think this website is valid – go to Reddit.com/r/hapas, which received 9 million views in 2 years, and 1.1 million views in the first month of 2017. Also – find half Asians with Asian fathers and compare their behavior to those with Asian mothers.
Imagine being raised by two racists – your own parents. Your own mother wanted a white man, yet here you are – a half Asian, a man who looks very Asian. Except you have a white father. Is it possible to raise a healthy child considering the loaded, white-worshipping nature of yellow fever and white fever? How can a biracial child be expected to be normal if he looks Asian, and the entire basis of his parents’ relationship was that the man not be Asian? How can Asian women outmarry at such high rates, have an open ‘white fetish,’ and expect Asian looking sons to be emotionally well adjusted?
In short: I am the son of a foreign born Asian woman from Hong Kong who deliberately married a tall (6’3″, skinny), red-haired, blue eyed, bearded white man. She, like many Asian women, sought out a man who had a “Western” background so that she could feel integrated into her new home, and better than her fully Asian peers. She was by and large mentally ill, violent, abusive, cruel towards my father when he wasn’t making enough money, extremely controlling, and had self-image issues, changing her entire appearance to “look white.” She did not and never did love my father, and only used him because he was white; their entire marriage was violent, loveless, and calculating.
This man was interested in Asian culture and married because he was socially unable to marry a white woman due to his political beliefs and personality quirks (he is very socially conservative, a Holocaust denier and anti-Semite, extremely homophobic, very shy, not many friends, belief that white women are too liberated, extremely meek and unable to make eye contact with others, steps off the sidewalk when larger men approach, unwilling to work or make money for fear of violating Christian scripture).
I was raised largely as a white child, yet turned more Asian in appearance with age. I was raised in an environment that had an undercurrent of anti-Asian male racism (America), saw Asian women (including almost all of them in my own family) throw themselves at white men (the majority of whom are racists, Republicans, or short and or meek), and also an over-current of false Eurasian myths about beauty and intelligence. I subconsciously always believed myself to be “less” because my own mother and her sisters all were married to white men and adamantly denied I was Asian for a decade.
My parents’ relationship was loveless, violent and broken due to her disillusionment with my father after ten years as he failed to make enough money, and grew balder and fatter and no longer lived up to the White male Prince Charming she had wanted (separate bedrooms, forced to sleep on the couch, extreme violent fighting). My brother and I suffered extreme psychological and physical abuse (beaten with coat hangers by our mother, Tiger Mommed, had her threaten to kill herself with a butcher knife in front of us, threatened to crash the car with us in it while driving at 90 mph), and her behavior became worse and worse as she realized that her white husband wasn’t making as much money as her brother and sister, who both married Chinese partners. This is a story of someone who was very sick, and in recovery.
When I got older, despite the fact that society told me that I was “unique” for being Eurasian, I was treated with contempt by both white people AND Asian people; Asian women would often express disgust at me for being Asian (scowling at me on the street, or smirking), and white people would constantly remind me that I was Asian in a way to demean and undermine me. This caused me to self implode from a popular, outgoing Eurasian to becoming a recluse and suicidal.
Two years after writing the below, I am leaving it word for word, as I wrote it, as proof of how I felt and feelings I still struggle with as a male of Asian heritage who clearly looks Asian, born to a mother who thought of Asian men as beneath her. I am highly educated, formerly well liked, popular, handsome, out going and like many Eurasians I burned out in my twenties with the realization that people, even Asian women,hate my Asian side,so now I’ve turned my talents towards exposing the last bastion of White supremacy in the world as candidly as I can. I am literally dissectingWhite male / Asian women couples and the Eurasian identity to a degree that nobody else ever has.
I actually moved to China (which saved my life) in order to escape racism and feelings of inferiority – and was shocked on learning that my own mother (and many other Chinese) had moved to America in order to find the American dream – a dream that hated me for my Asian blood.
I highly recommend that any potential parent to half-Asian children make sure that they are marrying on a clean slate – with zero fetishism, zero white-worship, and zero undertones of racial hierarchies – and that they be completely honest about this, to avoid sending more young man down the path that I went.
I am doing this for every single half-Asian kid out there who has committed suicide, thought about suicide, suffered from racism, isolation, outcasting, and had two parents whose entire relationship was nothing but lust, selfishness, even hatred – leaving us with nothing but perpetual isolation. The world does not care about Hapa males if you look average or even a little bit Asian. The world – even Asian women, who truly believe that they are white – only care about whiteness and white men.
Most Eurasians just look Asian. At best they will look like good looking Asian men, but usually look average.
Most women don’t want any Asian blood at all (I’ve been shot down for being Asian three times – despite being tall, good looking, and popular, and this was enough to destroy me forever).
Asian women think tall blond white men are better, so that means white men are better than Eurasians.
People who hate Asian men – including most women – don’t distinguish between half and full. We are still chinks, inferior to the white men they wanted.
Asian women marry white men for social access – i.e., to higher society, access to European spaces, but we, their half Asian sons, are severely limited from those same spaces due to racial insults, disparaging remarks and open discrimination
You’re literally asking your own son to take pride in the fact that he looks Asian… but his own mother and all her friends and literally all but a few women around him don’t want Asian men? Really? Are you really asking us to do that?
Even more telling is that 90% of all half Asian people have white dads and Asian moms and we’re supposed to not notice this somehow – we’re not allowed to talk about it despite the fact that no matter where we go – there are Asian women openly preferring white men – meaning that half Asian blood is essentially worthless.
“Chicks dig mixed guys,” is what I hear a lot. How come whenever a Eurasian says this he’s twenty years old, a permanent virgin, and has no experience with women at all? Chicks dig white looking mixed guys. They don’t dig Asian looks at all. Stop lying about this.
I’m going for total transparency. I try to explain being Eurasian as best as I can. I’m not pretending to be a moral or good person. I am exactly what I am, meaning I was born from two people whose intentions were never clear. You can develop your own theories; Oedipal, Freudian, emasculation, narcissism, failed expectations, mental illness, hybrid depression, anything you want, but I will tell you what it’s like.
When I see stories like this, the first thing I think is that, shit, I was almost there. Please believe me. Being a Eurasian male is something almost inexplicably terrifying to ourselves. Not to all of us, but to some of us.
I hold back on a lot of my explanations for two reasons.
I have the number one half-Asian blog, if not website, on the internet right now so eventually I’m going to catch the eye of someone who knows me. This would essentially be familial suicide.
I don’t want to genuinely talk about the kind of mental illness I went under out of fear of… whatever. You guess. Flashing lights, sirens, etc. Sad to say, I went through a phase like that, but I’m over it now, ironically after keeping this blog.
During this phase I felt like I was no longer in control. It’s hard to explain, when your mind is so far gone that you feel as if you no longer own your own actions. I felt like I was being trapped in my own appearance, desperate to claw my way out by any means. And the rage, and anger. The sense of being abandoned, the loneliness, the isolation.
I myself admit that I’m a far cry from how either the Asian community or the white community would expect of someone from my educational background.
I also admit that, as far as my readers can tell, I’m “not all there,” I’m a very emotionally damaged person, hurt at a deep level and deeply distrustful of human beings. I am not a good person, I am in fact probably the complete opposite of what a Tiger Mom and a conservative dad – or any kind of upstanding human being – would want from a child. Again, far from the “Eurasian” master race myth, but…
There’s one thing I know and that is that my kind of problem isn’t unique. Up until I went to college I never met another Eurasian male with a white father except for one, who was half Philippino and huge.
I thought this absence was unusual in retrospect. Most of the Eurasians I knew were girls with white fathers or either gender with Asian fathers. It’s as if we were just dropping like flies early on.
I want to explain why guys like the above story are pulling knives on people.
We snap, that’s all it is, really, and the reason is because we feel as if we have no hope.
It’s not like full Asians, who have the hope of becoming rich and getting married. With Eurasians we’re essentially told from birth that looking how we look is somehow a crime.
Full Asian guys say, hey, at least my mom and dad love me, they support me and wish the best for me. For Eurasian guys, it’s like, we don’t even know our own parents. We don’t know who they are. They don’t even know who they are. I mean if you think about it you have two people from totally different backgrounds getting together for reasons that neither one of them is perfectly clear about…. and if they were clear about it, they’d be bad fucking reasons.
Essentially the fetishization clouds their relationship so much that they wind up having such a weird, weird dynamic between the two, and more often than not they converse in broken English. Sometimes I wonder if my mother’s frustration also stemmed from her inability to express herself clearly.
I mean, Christ, just think about it. Just think about it for a moment.
It’s an Asian woman being penetrated by a white man. His arm around her in all your photos. White dominating Asian.
You go online and see people who look like you absent from everywhere. From pornos, from books, from movies. You see Keanu Reeves, that’s all.
You look Asian, but you don’t. You can’t be Asian. Your dad is white. You can’t be.
You go out and try to make friends. Then the jokes start. Small dick this, chink that.
You say, fuck this, I’m going to be proud to be Asian.
Then you realize that Asian men around you are a laughing stock as well.
You catch your mom watching Bradley Cooper. She’s watching pale, big nosed white guys that look just like your dad. Forget Oedipal – talk Freudian.
You look Asian. Even your own dad thinks Asian jokes are funny. He’s totally aloof. Even your own mom thinks they’re funny.
Your mom makes comments about your tall nose, your eyes, as if you are a doll. You’re not Asian, she says. But you are.
You begin to hate everything about yourself. Your hair texture. It looks Asian. Your nose looks Asian. Your eyes look a little bit Asian. You want to just… claw them out, pull your fucking hair out. You’re white. My dad is white.
Maybe you’re good looking, maybe you’re not. It doesn’t matter – because you’re still a chink and good looking chinks don’t matter.
You begin to feel trapped, and hopeless. The Hapa beauty myths don’t help. Most people just look at you like a chink. You complain to your mom, but she’s in the arms of a man who looks exactly like the people calling you a chink, day in, and day out.
Boom. You realize that you’re in the defeated class – but who defeated you?
Wait for it – your own parents, the people who should have been with you since day one. And not only that, but it dawns on you that Asian culture itself, the culture you were raised halfway in, was and is so callous as to not give a single shit about your wellbeing. It was as if, here’s some white blood, deal with it.
It’s all incredible bizarre. And it has to do with something I still haven’t figured out yet. Just the insane degree of cruelty present in Asian culture that places the individual last, or the massive degree of racism in white culture, just combined for a nuclear level meltdown.
I’m past it now. I’ve moved on. It’s just fair to point out that being Eurasian born in the 1980’s meant that we went through an incubation period. I think this blog should just be a monument to the shit we had to deal with. It takes thirty years for a person to cook fully and within those thirty years some of us just can’t take the heat.
I think it’s time to admit that half-Asian sons have a problem before this gets worse, and it is getting worse; this brings the tally of half Asians to make national news in 2016, to 6.
All of them with white fathers. Let me reiterate: there were 6 half-Asians in the news in the year 2016, alone.
It is February 26th, meaning we are 57 days into the year 2016, and there have been 6 major incidents that have made national news.
Six out of six of these incidents involved half Asian children with white fathers.
Six out of six.
There will be more incidents this year involving half Asians.
They will be uniformly young, more or less in Elliot Rodger’s age bracket.
All of them will have white fathers.
Read this here, on this website: each and every one of them will have a white father.
These are not black criminals committing terrible crimes; these are the sons of white men and Asian women – the supposed master-race of beautiful, talented Eurasians.
Do I need to get into why, again?
Read the blog:
the collision between race fetishism, emasculation, white supremacy, self-hatred, mental illness, cultural and racial confusion, racial bullying, isolation at being mixed race, the Asian mother bad-mouthing Asian men, lack of Asian friendships, lack of Hapa friendships, the white father’s racism, the sexual dynamics between mother and father, the colonialism, the lack of resemblance to ones own parents, and depression are routine in Hapas. Not rare, but routine.
It’s farcical how Asian women intend to instill in us a proper sense of value and self worth when our entire existence is based on how inferior the genes of Asian males are, yet we by and large resemble Asian males.
Listen to me very, very carefully. Read the following words next as if they were written by the Queen mother herself:
I know exactly what I’m talking about when I say that being mixed race is much, much more traumatic than our parents could ever realize, and we have almost no outlet and no resources at all.
The mental illness evident on the early pages of this blog are proof enough that something is amiss, not just in me – but the half-Asian demographic at large.
I am Eurasian. I am not the white man who can take and pick any Asian woman he pleases. In order for me to develop a healthy identity – I must be proud of my Asian heritage. My mother, western culture, and Asian women around me made it very, very difficult to accept myself.
I am cream of the crop – highly educated.
At my very lowest, the feeling of being so alone, so aloof, undesirable, betrayed, self-hating and confused, that I can say with accuracy that I was not in control of myself anymore. I’d hate to say it – but Eurasians are completely unique in our situation as opposed to other mixes, and we, and I – at one point – posed a danger to ourselves and those around us.
Saw these comments on my blog posted elsewhere on the web.
Asian women preferring white men, and outright rejecting men of their own race, is strange and even seems unnatural, but I’m not a psychiatrist or anthropologist. I would think that people would instinctively prefer their own race/ethnicity for group association and especially bond-pairing and having children. Could this behavior be considered a mental illness? How much of this is learned behavior (e.g., social programming/conditioning) and how much is biological or instinctive?
You guys seem to underestimate the psychological toll of being mixed race, and also having WMAW shoved in your face. Think it emasculates Asian men? It fucks us up more.
What’s the problem here? You know for a fact for so many Asian women to openly despise Asian men, that there’s something going on. So why would your own sons be different?
Because you’re a “good father?” Because you encourage them to “work out?” Because Asian men have never worked out before?
By oversimplifying it you guys really, really, REALLY took a huge gamble. The next few decades should be interesting.
You guys missed the big point: Asian women are actively rejecting Asian men in droves, both in Asia and the West. Why on earth do you think this can be surmounted with petty advice? Will or will not your own son be Asian?
I can believe a chunk of it – and how it could possibly screw someone up.
As I laid it out for Quartermain on my blog, nobody actually knows the mental processes and social background of those girls who chase western men. After all: if your mom is nuts, and projects that nuttiness onto you, you’re going to go just a little bit weird and loopy in many ways as a natural consequence.
Which is going to be “interesting” for the children of single mommies. Especially the male children.
There are obviously exceptions, however the examples I know of happen exactly like described. I knew a couple of Thai girls who were half British and they had an amazing time at university living in Australia getting invited everywhere and talked to by both Thai and whites.
One of their brothers came over thinking Australia was welcoming and found himself always tagging along with his big sister because no one wanted to know him on his own.
He dropped out, gained 40kg and moved back in with his parents and is a stoner/gamer.
His sister married a successful Thai businessman and goes to all the big corporate functions as a trophy wife.
He was a nice enough guy, just the whole introverted shy Asian thing is much more attractive in girls than it is in guys.
My blog originated in 2014. In 2009 I was at the peak of my “crazy” behavior (i.e. losing 60 pounds in 3 months, having extreme body image issues as a man, and overall attempting to be white).
In 2009, people were already noticing this. If any of the readers here actually went out and met some Hapas, they would start noticing certain patterns.
Largely – it’s a difficult proposition to navigate the world as a half-Asian child, born under the conditions that white fathers were better than Asians. Look at it from this perspective.
Your half Asian son sees white women laughing at Asian men – then sees Asian women laughing at Asian men – and then sees his own mother married to a white man, and all her friends married to white men.
If my readers think that this line of thought is largely limited to me, or this blog, you’re sorely mistaken.
Any white fathers / Asian mothers who believed that they were truly innocent would be attempting to nip this in the bud now, rather than wait. But in actuality, this is the truth:
These people actually do believe that white men are superior – yet raise half Asian children. The probability of us being resentful of our parents, angry, mentally unbalanced or manic depressive is very, very high.
At this point I am just putting out these posts to fill the gaps in the search engines for these issues, hence the excessive tagging… for a long time coming. The point of this site is to exist for at least another decade, and my ultimate goal is to make this into the premier website on half-Asian issues, replace all previous discussion of half-Asian issues (e.g., the Kip Fulbeck Camp, Hapavoices, etc.) and so far everything is going according to plan.
I need to reiterate that my dad is racist. He very much hates black people; when buying a Christmas gift yesterday I had to avoid making a certain purchase because I didn’t want to buy a very well known brand owned by a very prominent rapper (now owned by Apple). I went with a lesser known brand because I knew he would never use the aforementioned “black brand.”
My father is also a Holocaust denier, constantly talks about the immigrant crisis in Syria, refers to black people as “the blacks,” so on and so forth. Luckily he’s not a Trump supporter as he believes that Trump is overcome with greed – an anti-Christian principle.
Luckily my dad was never racist against Asians, but apparently there are a lot of white men in relationships with Asian women who hate Asian men even worse. The potential blowback for this is massive.
Anyways, racist white men often times seek out Asian women. Why?
A) Asian women are well known to defer to white men, rarely to black men.
B) Asian women are known for their “traditional values”; i.e., they love living in white countries, and are outspoken in their hatred for black people and are not notorious as white women (although this is a myth) for sleeping with black men.
C) Like Dylan Roof said, Asians are an “honorable race.” Hence their women are honorable women. The only basis for their “honor” would be their perceived value of whiteness.
D) White men with extreme racist views cannot attract white women; so they go for Asian women, who will forgive their views in exchange for whiter babies, (likely before summarily dropping their husbands, like mother did). The whiter babies will then be raised as white, like Marcus Epstein.
E) The largest irony is that Asians are seen as “genetically the most similar” to whites, (my dad has told me that “East and West are the same”), so the children have a much higher chance of looking white (or in my case, whitish), so it’s essentially killing two birds with one stone.
Do not fall for this! I will make sure this website dominates Google rankings from here on in to ensure that these crimes do not go unpunished! If you know people like this, cut them out of your life, but do not blame the children.
There are going to be a tremendous, massive amount of Hapas / Eurasians born in the coming years; almost all of them with white fathers. The amount of baggage from this is going to be too much for these young people to handle. I don’t give two shits about the behavior of Asian men or other cultural reasons for this. The outcome remains uniform.
Asian women are deliberately saying that Asian men are not worthy, inferior, or generally sub-par in comparison to Asian, and even non-Asian men. There is no way that a generation of half-Asians is going to be able to generate a healthy identity as a result of this. A handful of “successful” Eurasians that you met in passing doesn’t indicate anything.
The majority of these Hapas will have had mothers that explicitly said “no Asians.” The rest will have Asian mothers who didn’t necessarily hate Asian men, but still decided that a white man was more suitable than an Asian man. Even more will have mentally-unstable mothers who decided irrationallythat white men provided a fantasy for her, one that he was stupid or selfish enough to entertain. (Mine was a combination of all three, hence the broken marriage). I suspect this is mere biology at play, wherein the average white guy is a better choice than the average Asian male; I suspect this has something to do with primitivism and body hair, or something else. Probably has to do with integration and more-so to do with utter fantastical dreaming. If you’re not sure, just look at how Asian women talk behind closed doors about “blue eyes” and European features. I’ve heard it time and time again.
As most Eurasians will notice that all other Eurasians have white fathers, and will come in contact with Asian women who say “no Asians,” this is setting an incredibly dangerous precedent. The difference between “bad couples” and “good couples” is going to be incredibly difficult to differentiate between as Asian women are seen time, after time, after time and time again with white men.
My father was, and is a “respectful” Asiaphile and at one point a PhD candidate in East Asian Studies, who could speak two Asian languages and yet the agony of being biracial remains; the agony of having a mother who valued race above anything remains; the agony of having a bad person as a mother remains, the agony of being rejected from both sides remains; the agony of having to live with the embarrassment of saying that my mother is Asian and my father white, remains.
What’s happening is this:
Asian women are choosing handsome white men over ugly Asian men
Asian women are choosing ugly white men over handsome Asian men
Asian women are choosing handsome white men over handsome Asian men
Asian women are choosing bad white men over good Asian men
Asian women are choosing bad white men over bad Asian men
Asian women are choosing good white men over bad Asian men
As we have seen with Daniel Holtzclaw and Elliot Rodger, the potential blowback from this is tremendous, as young Eurasian men are reminded constantly of their low value before they even set out the door. There is absolutely nothing that could convince a Eurasian with eyes in his head of his inherent value when this is so common.
I challenge anyone who reads this to provide me a reason why this is not fundamentally correct on a terrifying level.
Imagine the utter hell of being a Eurasian son but being literally surrounded by Asian women who literally worship white men, and even worse, seeing this within your own home. We live this every day. The ones who don’t look white enough to disregard any discussion of race.
Essentially, these couples are expecting Eurasians to take this baggage, and figure it out on their own, independently, without a single word of advice from two people completely opposed to their interests as Eurasian men.
I’m guessing you guys didn’t think that one through, did you.
Yeah, good luck. Seriously. You’re all going to need it. There are literally millions of us and all it would take would be another Renz, Holtzclaw, De Grood or Rodger before it becomes your problem. Or, you could read this website and reexamine your entire lives to prevent what is now inevitable.
Or you could pretend I’m not Eurasian, everything I said is a lie, and go back to whatever meaningless crap you do.
If no one else is going to talk about these things, I am going to. This blog is well on its way to being the number one half-Asian resource on the internet. Any commenters here would be smart to stick around. “Suck it up,” and “he’s hot” comments don’t work in reality.
The majority of people on this blog claim that their wives / girlfriends / mothers weren’t looking for white men. Yet the fact remains that this is the most common interracial pairing, bar none. And the resulting children look Asian. So either I am lying, or someone else is lying. I am not lying, because I know for fact, from my father’s mouth, that my mother threw myself at him because he was white.
The result is that among these millions of children born, ideally the maximal potential for their abilities should be achieved, but since their own parents dictated to them that race matters, and that Asian men were inferior to white men, the potential for burning out is massive, especially as they get older and “sexual preferences” become more of an issue past childhood.
There is little that would ever convince me to be a good, upstanding, or productive citizen if I found out that my own mother preferred white men. What kind of horror would this amount to if a child caught wind of this – that ones own mother hated Asianness, and Asian men – the ones capable of producing full Asian children – yet producing a half Asian son?
Anyone who has ever known more than one Hapa would attest to this.
Anyways, morsels of wisdom from /r/Hapas, the only real community of Eurasians on the internet, one growing daily and destined to become a massive collective think tank for all Hapa / Eurasian / half-Asian issues.
Coming from her position, it would be “problematic” for her to ever directly challenge the choices of Asian women, as bluntly as we do at [here].
But she is definitely hinting at some of our points. She brings up that Eurasian boys might seek to be white, at the very young age of 5; because of all the anti-Asian racism. She also calls out the hypocrisy of a WMAF Asian woman judging a 5 year old boy for his Asian shame. In context “As a child, I most wanted to fit in.” points to the Asian mother wanting to be “normal” (read white). And so the author is at least gingerly hinting at the Asian mother contributing to the valuing of whiteness, and then judging her son for seeking the very thing she values. It just shows that the r/Hapas position is not as “crazy” as our critics made it out to be a few months ago, and is even gaining traction among the Hapa Establishment, from leading figures within mixed race feminism and social justice.
More from him;
There are numerous articles written by Asian moms about wanting to preserve the Asian side of their Hapa sons. The problem is that, these Hapas are not feeling shame about their Asian side for no reason. And the plain fact is, these Asian moms might very will be prime contributors to Asian shaming, by making their outmarriage and racial preferences known in such huge numbers.It is impossible to look at outmarriage in such monumental numbers and not interpret it as a judgement against Asian and Half Asian men.And many Asian women are quite open in saying it.
I don’t believe Hapas should try to pretend they are white. I believe it is a strategy doomed to fail. But I can certainly understand why at age 5, a Hapa would think being an Asian boy is something to run away from. The Asian mom acts so shocked and horrified by it. Not realizing that the millions of women like her ARE making being an Asian boy something to be ashamed of. To put it bluntly as long as WMAF remains so imbalanced, and on a scale unlike any other race of women, Hapa boys WILL be ashamed to be Asian. Some might come to hate WMAF for emasculating them. While others will go in the other extreme direction of becoming White Nationalists to prove their whiteness. Asian women are making Asianess something to be ashamed of in their sons.
Tsui writes about when she was younger she wanted to “fit in”. If we flesh out the real meaning of these sentiments, it probably means that she wasn’t a “real American” because she was Asia. Now that she has a white husband shes “normal”. And of course her Half white son also wants to be normal. His mom is Chinese, but hes not. I believe that the bloggers was at least softly chiding Tsui on some of these exact points.
His particularly chilling comment:
Perhaps Tsui as an individual is sincere yet problematic. My personal belief is that being a WMAF Hapa son, can’t be separated from the nature of actually existing WMAF. In which it carries a ton of racial and gender baggage, and is happening in such a manner as that a Half Asian boy would have legitimate reasons to feel shame at being an Asian boy.
It’s nice to see a hapa speak out for us and criticize these (always Asian) mothers who insist on speaking for their children while they are too young to disagree. These (until recently) were the only hapa narratives that ever seemed to get any readership. Funnily enough, when their children grow up and have voices of their own, their words are rarely so self-serving.
It annoys me when parents extol the virtues of being mixed race and ramble about how they are doing the world a service, making it more color blind. Further fragmenting a community that is already as fragmented as the Asian-American community is is not doing anyone a service except the Asian women who leave it and the white men they inevitably marry. Interracial marriage does NOT make for better race relations unless a majority percent of the population is very open to them, and with all races and genders in equal measure. If this is not the case, it may even make existing race relations worse.
Being hapa in many ways is trading undiluted Asianness – the languages, the cultures, having a huge part of the world that belongs to people like you, and everything that entails – for white DNA. Is it worth it?
Ultimately the hope is that we would never have had issues with it. For twenty years Asian women and white men prayed fervently that these issues would never be revealed as being less than innocuous. And given that there are so many hapas coming here agreeing and yet a number who just plug their ears and scream “no it’s not true!” reveals in actuality that these women do indeed wish that asianness be subverted without any collateral damage.
Now that the collateral damage is happening, they are quickly backtracking on their hatred.